Season One, Episode 11: “Life, Death, Eternity”
story by Anthony Yerkovich
written by Gregory Hoblit and Lee David Zlotoff
directed by Jack Starrett
original airdate: March 12, 1981
“Previously on Hill Street Blues…”
Roll Call: Our usual in medias res involves Phil updating the shivering, huddled squad on the status of their broken heater (pausing to hand a handkerchief to a sneezing Morgan). Item 14: Phil’s angry because officers are deliberately taking their units through “Sniper Alley” in order to try and induce thrown bottles, rocks, and the like. And I mean angry, angrier than we’ve seen him so far in the series.
He’s interrupted by a 1″ drill bit very nearly penetrating the back of Lucy’s head as she leans against the wall. As Phil continues, Marv emerges and apologetically cleans drywall dust off Lucy’s shoulder. Phil concludes by confirming that Furillo is up for Divisional Commander, and it’s obvious nobody’s happy about it. As everyone leaves, Lucy exhorts Marv, who is sweating like a stuck pig, to get to a doctor. Meanwhile, Andy and Bobby are chatting with new cops, Ludwig and his partner Carmichael; after they depart, Phil tells Hill and Renko on the down-low that the other pair are on the “F-list” — this is their last chance as cops. With that, we roll credits.
Frank’s on the phone, and he’s hot. Someone botched the phone trace intended to nab Fay’s obscene caller, and the Midtown Captain isn’t available because he’s playing racquetball. Fay, despite sitting right there listening to Frank blast the responsible party, dumps all over Frank and tries to guilt him by mentioning that Frank Jr. was listening on the other extension. Frank wants to talk to his son about any concerns, but Fay says Harvey is handling it, because he’s a professional. Frank’s just the boy’s father, apparently. Phil interrupts to tell Frank he’s running late; Fay is snotty, and Frank escapes.
Cut to a lunch table, where we finally get our first glimpse of Chief Fletcher Daniels. Howard is at this breakfast, along with Ed Chapel, Commander Swanson, and some other folks. It’s obvious this is a regular get-together; it’s equally obvious Frank’s not a regular. Why’s Howard there? He’s to receive the police association’s “Mental Health Award.”
I’m just gonna leave that there a minute.
Daniels then suggests letting Chapel and Furillo fight for the commander slot, like with fists and all. He laughs so hard at his own joke that he chokes on his food, and Frank has to Heimlich him. (The Heimlich was still a pretty new thing at the time.) Daniels expels a chunk of ham… right onto Howard’s plate. Poor idiot. Frank’s pager goes off, saving him from further awkwardness.
Ludwig brings in a perp, and then his attention is diverted by Belker’s arrival. Ludwig drops several racist slurs, but when Phil intervenes it turns out that Ludwig is missing a finger… and he alleges Mick bit it off at the academy. Ray calms Mick down, and Lucy then hands him the phone; it’s Frank. Except it’s not, because the phone’s dead, causing Ray to go on a rant about how nothing works and blaming Marv. Lucy goes to find Marv, starts busting on him for sleeping on the job, and… welp. He’s asleep alright. For good.
Frank’s at the jail, where Schneider’s waiting for him. Turns out Davenport is on the case, and Schneider blames Frank for playing politics to try and get the promotion. They head in to the interrogation room, where Nemo Rodriguez wants to talk. He’s pinning the murder on Councilman MacAuley, which amuses the hell out of Schneider. He stops being amused when Joyce produces paperwork: there’s an apartment where the victim was staying. Someone had to rent it, and she wants it searched.
Heading out, Frank and Joyce discuss the matter. Frank’s not sure he’s telling the truth because Rodriguez has changed his story; Joyce isn’t sure she believes him either. And then she breaks up with him. Sort of. For a while.
Back at the station, everyone’s in shock over Marv, who was apparently only 32. Phil is waxing eloquent, which annoys J.D. Ray, who just two scenes ago was blasting him over the phones being dead, calls him the best phone man there ever was. Of course, it seems nobody can remember his last name. After about 30 seconds of gags where they try and remember it, things get serious when the coroner comes out with the body… and needs the deceased’s full name on a 1050 form. Who saves the day? Howard Hunter.
Frank returns, giving instructions on tracking down MacAuley, and discovers Marv’s dead. More gag reel, as Frank knew his full name too, and then Henry and Ray argue over the diagnosis that nobody knows jack about anyway. Frank wants his file so he can call his wife, but Marv was single and has no next of kin listed. LaRue takes the moment after Frank walks off to try and sell annuities to Phil, Henry, and Ray. Ray falls for it. Sheesh.
Howard barges into Frank’s office, sucking up and trying to ride Frank’s coattails. He’s got a mockup of a new SWAT vehicle he’s really horny for (and which the Chief has already bought him): the Personnel Armored N-Series Defense Attack vehicle. The PANDA. Howard wants to use it to clean up Sniper Alley. Frank’s PISSED. Swanson arrives just as Frank’s yelling for Ray to get Daniels on the horn. After backing Howard up and then sending him on his way, Swanson gets to the point of his visit: he wants to know why Frank’s stalking MacAuley, and asks him to back off and let Schneider handle it.
In their car, J.D. is trying to hit Neal up for one last grand to get him over the top on his Saloondramat scheme. Neal ain’t buying (LaRue’s already into him for $3200 anyway, remember). Then Neal spots a guy selling cigarettes out of the trunk of his car. Which means J.D. is going to be late for his meeting with the realtor, but they drag the perp with them to meet Henry at the vacant location. The place is a dump, and the realtor’s trying too hard to get Henry on board. Finally, J.D. takes one last dance with Neal, who finally gives in. And already regrets it.
Hey, it’s Grace Gardner! Phil is commisserating with her over Marv’s passing, and has decided maybe a trip to a Mexican nudist colony with Grace is a dandy idea.
Chesley calls in to Frank to let him know MacAuley’s nowhere to be found. LaRue and Washington bring in their perp, Mick’s on the phone with mom, and Ludwig comes in and starts taunting him with the Hava Nagila. Mick almost bites when Ludwig challenges him, but is the better man. Phil enters and summons Ludwig and Carmichael to Furillo’s office for a private chat. Phil blasts them for the racism… and for their unit looking like swiss cheese because they went to Sniper Alley against orders. Their punishment: demotion to foot patrol.
Cut to the locker room, where Belker is trying to compose himself… and Ludwig walks in. Mick doesn’t back down this time. Frank returns, gets messages from Phil, and the commotion carries into the squad. Everyone rushes to the locker room. Yes, Mick nearly bit off another finger.
After commercial, we see Mick in Frank’s office through the window as Neal and J.D. come in discussing the plan in passing, but the focus is the cigarette guy trying to talk Leo out of locking him in the cell with common hoodlums. Morgan wanders in and announces that the heat appears to be working finally. Frank, done with Belker, tells Phil to get Ludwig and Carmichael the hell out of his precinct. And then Henry comes out of the bathroom with Marv’s tool belt.
Fay enters, crying, and Frank drags her off to his office. Her stalker has been in her apartment now, digging through her clothes. She apologizes for going off on him earlier in the day. Frank wants Swanson and Eckert (the Midtown captain) on the phone, together, immediately. He gets Swanson, but not Eckert. Guess he’s still playing racquetball. While he’s on the phone, we get another Phil and Fay chatting about Phil’s love life scene. Of course, Fay’s had enough discussion about sexual matters of late…
Schneider arrives, wanting Frank and Ray. Frank got a warrant on the apartment, because the only other option — in light of Schneider not doing anything — was to subpoena MacAuley, which would make everything public. And the search turned up enough evidence to bury MacAuley: he was paying the rent, the victim’s phone book had his number in it, and there were pictures of her and MacAuley together. While Schneider and Frank joust, Davenport calls. MacAuley, who’s avoided the police all day, is on Channel 6 giving an interview. MacAuley’s wife is there, backing him up. Schneider’s sort of smug as he departs.
As Frank departs, Phil holds him up to tell him the furnace won’t shut off. He tells Phil to call a repairman and bill it as an informant. Then Phil tells Frank he has a pile of transfer requests — 28 uniforms, 17 plainclothes, and one part-timer. Frank takes off, bemused. And so do we.
Look, Pizza Man: “I think we’re asking for it if we don’t give it a rest until this thing is over.” Joyce sidelines Frank, because let’s be honest: they’re in a very serious conflict of interest with Frank deeply involved in a murder investigation wherein she’s defending the accused, all while Frank’s bucking for promotion and a city councilman might suddenly be involved. It’s a perilous situation.
Would You Prefer Internal Injuries?: Mick doesn’t really have much dialogue this episode, other than the phone conversation with his mom, which follows the standard formula. “The man is 83,” etc. etc. But he does growl. A lot. And his sly grin after the fight with Ludwig is over is pretty awesome.
I’m Unarmed: “I know this sounds a little maudlin, but this is about all we have left of him.” Henry makes the case for Marv’s tool belt being a memorial of sorts.
My Car!: Andy and Bobby only appear in the first scene with Ludwig and Carmichael, and their dialogue is basically limited to a lot of “Mmm-hmm” and “uh-huh”.
Judas Priest!: “Judas H. Priest! That’s Marv Box!” Well, you’re good for something, Howard. Take it and run.
Mano a Mano: Lucy’s around for much of the episode without doing anything of substance, although she is of course the fulcrum upon which Marv’s death rests. Her chiding of Marv’s corpse for screwing around and pretending to be asleep sets up the reveal rather well.
I’m Good For It: “Aw, man, I was depressed enough already. Tell him to cool it, will ya?” LaRue’s ever-sympathetic reaction to Phil’s rhapsodic musings on Marv’s passing. And his last ditch effort to soak Neal: “I got somethin’ here, man. I know I do. What are we without a dream? Think of Marv.” Groan.
What’s Up, Lover?: “They have been known to lie, Sarge.” Neal’s not talking about suspects; he’s talking about station maintenance. Neal also utters the episode title in response to J.D.: “The man’s right on the mark, babe. Life. Death. Eternity. Etcetera.”
Not Now, Fay: “Are you late for your racquetball game?” Fay, blistering Frank over someone else’s problem because he puts up with it, I guess. Seriously, this is one of Fay’s lowest moments as a character. Yes, her situation is awful. You don’t eviscerate the one person who’s actually interested in helping you when they’re doing everything in their power. She does apologize later in the day, but come on.
Central Booking: Multiple recurring guest stars return in this episode, including those just hanging around for this arc: Dolph Sweet as Schneider, Jordan Charney as Ed Chapel, Dana Gladstone as Marv, George Dickerson as Swanson, and Don Cervantes as Nemo Rodriguez.
Barbara Babcock returns as Grace Gardner after a five-episode absence, and Gerry Black is here as Alf Chesley. (Black, notably, will all but disappear from the series for nearly the next year, with the season two premiere “Hearts and Minds” being his only appearance over the next 16 episodes.) Our last returnee, Jake Mitchell, makes his final appearance; we won’t be seeing Officer Hingle again.
Also joining for a pair of episodes are George McDaniel as Ludwig and Dennis Holohan as Councilman MacAuley. Both return next time, both uncredited. Seth Allen makes his only appearance as “Suspect” (the guy selling cigarettes), and Barbara Worthington makes the first of two visits to the Hill as an unnamed reporter; she’ll return in “Hearts and Minds”. All four were career bit players. The realtor is uncredited, and I’m not sure who he is.
Dwight Schultz receives only his second career credit, playing Carmichael for this episode only. Schultz, of course, would find huge fame just a couple of years later as “Howling Mad” Murdock on The A-Team, and would later appear in Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: First Contact, and Star Trek: Voyager as the anxiety-ridden Ensign (later Lieutenant) Barclay. Since then, he’s mostly devoted himself to voice work in animation and video games.
This is the last time we’ll mention Robert Hirschfeld in this space; Leo Schnitz will now be an integral part of the show until he leaves for good after the 100th episode (and a season as a main cast member), missing only three episodes between now and then. It’s the first time we’ll be officially mentioning Jon Cypher, however. Cypher finally appears on-screen as Chief Daniels, and while he’ll be in and out a lot, he’ll also be a mostly-regular member of the cast right through to the series conclusion. Cypher had a long career as a guest player on numerous shows, mostly soaps of both the daytime and primetime variety; he also later co-starred as General Craig on Major Dad.
Rap Sheet: It’s Lee David Zlotoff’s last writing credit on the Hill; he’ll go do some work on Bret Maverick and Remington Steele before creating MacGyver. Gregory Hoblit gets his only writing credit on the show, but he’s been around since the pilot as a producer, will be promoted to supervising producer with season two, and will ultimately become co-executive producer with Bochco. This won’t be the last time he appears in this section, though, as he’ll also end up directing 14 episodes.
Speaking of directing, Jack Starrett helmed this episode, the next-to-last credit in his directorial career. Starrett headed up a ton of B-movies before drifting into TV directing with Starsky and Hutch in 1975. He was also an actor, and will in fact appear in a season two episode of Hill Street; on-screen, he’s had a couple of very notable roles: Gabby Johnson in Blazing Saddles, and the brutal deputy chief, Galt, in First Blood.
The episode is sometimes titled “Life, Death, Eternity, Etc.”, reflecting the full line spoken by Washington. Officially, however, the etcetera is missing.
Verdict: Just as a note, we subtly learn in this episode that homicide is completely handled by Division, which explains the lack of any dedicated homicide detectives in the regular cast.
The Marv plotline was that weird combination of surprise and obvious; that is, they set up Marv’s death so that everything seemed obvious in retrospect, but if you’re watching the series for the first time it’s not obvious until it happens. I can’t help but feel, though, that this would have worked better if Marv had been a recurring character from the pilot on. Then again, the original plan was to kill Renko, so this was probably a replacement concept.
The murder subplot has a very interesting wrap. As of the end of this episode, we — the audience — are still completely in the dark regarding one very major question. Was Rodriguez just trying to pin the murder on MacAuley, knowing there was evidence to tie him to the victim? Or was MacAuley’s story that his wife knew the victim and they considered her family after getting to know her the truth? The dangle is especially effective when Schneider departs Frank’s office by subtly suggesting that MacAuley was just trying to avoid being dragged into the case and that Frank couldn’t be told. We’ll find out next episode, but chronologically the plotline is perfectly devised.
The Ludwig plotline is just stupid. It’s not because it wasn’t socially acceptable to speak that way in 1981; stuff like that still happened all the time without bystanders getting involved. Except for one small issue: the squad on the Hill makes fun of Mick for his temper, but they love him. He is their friend, even though he doesn’t tend to socialize with them. There is no way in hell the squad would tolerate a couple of asshats who just transferred in behaving that way toward one of their own. That lack of awareness ruins the entire plotline, because the plotline requires Ludwig to be able to openly taunt Belker over and over without anyone stepping in to defend Mick. (J.D. does, at one point, tell Ludwig he’s making a big mistake, but that’s not quite the same.)
The best part of the episode, however, is that we finally meet the notorious Chief Daniels. Make no mistake: the pompous, smug martinet you see in the one scene here is what you’ll get for most of the next six years. He’s a critical, if infrequent, addition to the cast.
Final score: 8. Two good plotlines handled well overshadow the stupid time-wasting C-plot.
Next Week: “I Never Promised You a Rose, Marvin” — basically an entire episode of epilogue as we wrap another arc.
