Seriously. You have got to see this shit. I have changed absolutely nothing except for stripping out a live bullshit link and inserting linebreaks so you don’t have to scroll sideways. (And no, the missing spaces are not because I’m a dumbass and didn’t insert linebreaks correctly. They were already missing.)
YAHOOMAIL.COM,. HOTMAIL. ,GMAIL.,AOL, VERIZON, ATT, SBC,AND ALL CUSTOMER ACCOUNT USERS? Warning: This message may not be fromwhom it claims to be. Beware of following any links in it or ofproviding the sender with any personal information. Learn more Dear Account Owner, It has come to our notice that youremail has not passed the verification/Update process that we arepresently working on. We are currently upgrading our data base ande-mail account center .We are deleting all Old Web mail email accountto create more space for new accounts.. To prevent your account fromclosing you will have to update it so that we will know that it's apresent used account. To complete your account re-confirmation, youmust reply to this email immediately and enter your account details asrequested below. ****IMPORTANT : ********************************************************* Email User-name : EMAIL Pass-word : date of birth.. Country or Territory : Email: **************************************************** ALL YOUR IMPORTANTS SHOULD BE VERIFY ALSO: This updating is compulsory as aresult of our recent server changes. If you fail to update your emailaddress you will soon be unable to receive/send mails.Also your emailwill not be equipped with the latest anti-virus system in our newservers. This will make your email and PC vulnerable to virus attacksfrom the internet. ****HOW TO UPDATE: To update simply reply the above toupgrading admin as appropriate. Failure to do so immediately will leadto SUSPENSION OF YOUR ACCOUNT. Thanks for your co-operation, Web-mail Administrato
Let’s parse.
1. Remember not to provide the sender personal information, which of course is the entire purpose of this phishing attempt. That’s like a panhandler walking up to you with his hand out and saying “Don’t give beggars money, and can I have a quarter?”
2. They’re deleting e-mail accounts. Webmail accounts. At multiple service providers, because you know that someone just has to delete all those old AOL accounts to make room for new Verizon accounts. That’s how businesses operate, right?
3. All your importants should be verify also. All your importants. All your importants. All your importants should be verify also. You have no chance to survive, make your time.
4. Your e-mail will not be equipped with the latest anti-virus system in their newsservers, guys! Well, shit, man. How am I supposed to get all my USENET emails now?
5. Failure to comply will make my PC vulnerable to attacks from the internet, even though if I don’t comply, I won’t be able to get my e-mail, which means my PC won’t download any of the no-longer virus-ridden e-mail, which means… uhh, how will my PC get infected now, exactly? Wouldn’t my inability to access my e-mail actually protect my PC from any possible infection that these cumfarts would have anything to do with? GOD I’M SO CONFUSED.
Seriously, man. You’d have to be a complete fucking dipshit to fall for this one, which come to think of it means these cockbags are probably already reading granny’s emails and whacking off to pictures of your sister. Anyone who actually falls for this phish should be immediately turned into tasty protein cakes.